I got an email this morning from a friend and a text from another yesterday just telling me he loved me, and it made me think about friendship. Please consider the following with me and work on being the right kind of friend.
What does Biblical friendship look like?
The words translated friend in the Bible are exciting. Basically, this is what they mean when you put them together: A friend is someone you know well, love, and trust. It has the idea of being joined or linked, of being combined into a whole. You can translate different friend words as companion, darling, bosom friend. Well, you grasp the idea.
A friend loves no matter what, when, or just no matter. Proverbs 17:17. Unreliable friends will ruin you, but there is a friend, Jesus, that sticks closer than even a brother. There are friends that stick like family. Proverbs 18:24.
Troublemakers stir up conflicts and work at separating even the best of friends. Proverb 16:28. True friends may hurt you, but they mean well. Enemies that pose as friends are super nice as they try to destroy you. Proverbs 27:5-6.
Real friends refresh you. Proverbs 27:9: We need our friends. Job 6:14.
Jesus is the greatest friend, and He gives His life to His friends. John 15:13.
Characteristics of True Friends
True friendship looks like love, support, understanding, and trust. It is a relationship where both individuals can be themselves without fear of judgment. True friends are there for each other through thick and thin, offering a shoulder to lean on and celebrating each other’s successes. They communicate openly and honestly and will forgive and move past any disagreements. Above all, genuine friendship is based on mutual respect and care for each other’s well-being.
What true friendship is not
It is not being friendly to get what you need or want.
It is not conditional.
Doesn’t change when your needs change.
It is not based on self-interest.
Not based on what they can do for you.
Is not selfish and one-sided.
Not about personal gain.
Is not manipulative or harmful.
Not fair weather love or running out at the sign of trouble.
Doesn’t walk out when everyone else does.
What genuine friendship is
Someone who genuinely cares about you, your experiences, and your feelings.
Someone who pays attention when you speak, asks relevant questions, and offers thoughtful, helpful advice.
Someone who respects your opinions and you do the same.
Someone that accepts you as you are even if they have to be honest with you and tell you the truth.
Genuine friendships require effort from both parties to maintain and strengthen the bond.
Genuine friends aren’t afraid to hold you accountable or offer constructive criticism when necessary.
Friends reveal their true friendship in times of adversity.
Genuine friends support each other expecting nothing in return.
True friends often challenge and support each other’s personal growth.
Authentic friendships often involve a level of vulnerability and self-disclosure.